Anything for a Sale!

Category: Skits

a.k.a.
Type of Skit Prank, Audience Participation, Funny
# of Participants 7
Props Needed: 3 chairs; bottle of ketchup; bottle of mustard;
jam; sprinkles; flour; bucket of water

Action

Sales Person: (Enters) I need a few volunteers to help out with this skit. This is my furniture store but I don’t have any furniture in it yet. I need three people to be couch cushions. The three of you must sit on these chairs and pretend to be the cushions of a couch. The ends of the couch need to hold their arms up like armrests. I need another volunteer to be a lamp. You will stand right here behind the couch. For my last volunteer, I need someone to be the coffee table. You will sit in front of the couch on your hands and knees. Thank you so much, I couldn’t do this without you. How about a round of applause for my volunteers? (Audience applauds) It is very important that you do not move, remember, you are pieces of furniture. No moving, laughing, or wiggling! Business has been really slow lately and I need to make a sale today!

Mother: I am here to find some QUALITY furniture.

Sales Person: Well, you’re in luck. My furniture is as good as it gets.

Mother: I certainly hope so, I have 9 children and they are VERY hard on my furniture.

Sales Person: Here, sit down and try out this couch. (Mother sits down) See, isn’t it comfortable?

Mother: (Puts her feet up on the coffee table) It is very comfortable but I’m worried about how the fabric will hold up to my 9 very busy and sloppy children.

Sales Person: Well, why don’t you try bouncing up and down on the couch? (Mother bounces from one cushion to the next) And the light, turn it off and on a few times. (Mother tugs at the hand of the volunteer pretending to be the lamp) And just feel how solid this wood coffee table is, go ahead, give it a knock. (Mother knocks on the coffee table)

Mother: The furniture does seem to be fairly sturdy but I really need to know how well it will hold up to spills and stains.

Sales Person: Just wait a moment. (Exits. Returns with a bottle of ketchup and starts squirting the couch)

Mother: That is very impressive, it doesn’t even show the stain!

Sales Person: (Exits. Returns with a bottle of mustard and starts squirting the lamp) How about that?

Mother: Hmm, I think I’m starting like it but what about the table?

Sales Person: (Exits. Returns with jam and smears it on the table, showing Mother how easily it can be wiped off) See? It wipes right off!

Mother: Well, my children love to bake. How would the furniture stand up to that?

Sales Person: (Exits. Returns with sprinkles and flour and spreads it over all of the furniture) See? Not a spot!

Mother: I am convinced of its durability but . . . how easy is it to clean?

Sales Person: (Exits. Returns with a bucket of water) It’s very simple, ma’am. (Splashes the water onto the furniture)

Mother: Yes, yes, that does seem to do the trick. What I’m worried about most of all though, is how it will stand up to fire because my children really love to play with matches.

Sales Person: I have some gasoline in the back. I could throw it on the furniture to show how flame resistant it is around matches!

Mother: Oh no, that won’t be necessary. I’m confident that this set will work, I’ll take it all.

Anything for a Sale

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“Anything for a Sale!!” on Ultimate Camp Resource

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Ants Marching

Category: Skits

a.k.a.
Type of Skit Walk-On, Funny
# of Participants Unlimited
Props None

Action

(In between songs or skits a line of participants enters, marching)
All: The ants go marching one by one, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching one by one, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching one by one, the little one stops to shoot his gun (One participant pretends to shoot at the audience), and they all … (Counselor stops the group and shoos them offstage)

(After another song or skit, the group enters again)
All: The ants go marching two by two, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching two by two, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching two by two, the little one stops to tie his shoe (One participant pretends to tie his/her shoe), and they all … (Counselor stops the group and shoos them offstage)

(After another song or skit, the group enters again)
All: The ants go marching three by three, hurrah, hurrah …
The ants go marching three by three, the little one stops to (one male participant stops and pretends to be unzipping his pants)

Camp Director: Hey! No, wait, stop! It’s “climb a tree, CLIMB A TREE!”
(Group runs away in different directions)

Ants Marching

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“Ants Marching” on Ultimate Camp Resource

Airplane Disaster

Category: Skits

a.k.a.
Type of Skit Funny
# of Participants 5
Props Needed: 2 chairs
Suggested: apple, banana, small ball

Action

(2 participants are seated, side-by-side, on the chairs. They are pretending to fly an airplane)
Pilot: The plane is a little too heavy – we can’t land!

Co-Pilot: I’ll throw this apple out. (Throws an apple out an imaginary window)

Pilot: We’re still too heavy to land!

Co-Pilot: I’ll chuck this banana out. (Throws a banana out)

Pilot: We’re still too heavy, throw something else out!

Co-Pilot: (Pretends to throw something out) Done.

Pilot: What did you throw out that time?

Co-Pilot: A grenade.

Pilot: I don’t think you should have done that. Oh, well, at least we can land now.

(Pilot and Co-Pilot land the plane and start walking away. They pass Camper 1 who is holding an apple and rubbing his/her head)

Pilot: What happened to you?

Camper 1: I was walking along and this apple fell out of the sky and hit me in the head!

(Camper 2 enters, rubbing his/her head and holding a banana)

Pilot: What happened to you?

Camper 2: I was walking along and this banana fell out of the sky and hit me in the head!

(Camper 3 enters, laughing)

Pilot: What happened to you?

Camper 3: I farted and the outhouse BLEW UP!

Airplane Disaster

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“Airplane Disaster” on Ultimate Camp Resource

7-Up

Category: Skits

a.k.a.
Type of Skit Funny
# of Participants 5
Props Needed: None
Suggested: 4 chairs; a clipboard

Action

(Four participants are sitting in a hospital waiting room. A nurse enters.)
Nurse: Hello Mr. Morrissey, I have great news! Your wife just gave birth to twins! (Exits)

Mr. Morrissey: (jumps up) Wow, this is really funny because I work as a talent agent for the Minnesota Twins! (Exits)

Nurse: (Enters) Hello Mr. Jenkins, I have wonderful news! Your wife just gave birth to triplets! (Exits)

Mr. Jenkins: (Jumps up) Wow, that’s amazing because I make tape at 3M! (Exits)

Nurse: (Enters) Hello Mr. Chester, I have exciting news! Your wife just gave birth to quadruplets!

Mr. Chester: (Jumps up) Wow, that’s cool because I draw The Fantastic Four!

Fourth Man: (Stands up) That’s it, I’m outta here.

Nurse: Why is that?

Fourth Man: I work at 7-Up! (Exits)

7-Up

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“7-Up Camp Skit” on Ultimate Camp Resource

Keep on the Sunny Side

Category: Songs

a.k.a.
Tune See video below
Type of Song Repeat-After-Me, Yells, Chants, and Cheers
Actions None
Similar Songs

Lyrics

CHORUS
Keep on the sunny side
Always on the sunny side
Keep on the sunny side of life
YEE-HAW!
You’ll suffer no pain
As we drive you all insane
So keep on the sunny side of life

v.1
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Eather
Eather who?
Eather Bunny!
HA HA HA!

CHORUS

v.2
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Anada
Anada who?
Anada Easter Bunny!
HA HA HA!

CHORUS

v.3
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Stella
Stella who?
Stella-nada easter bunny!
HA HA HA!

CHORUS

v.4
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Twuck
Twuck who?
Twuck go beep beep and run over ALL the Easter Bunnies!
HA HA HA!

CHORUS

v.5
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Boo
Boo who?
Don’t cry, there’ll be more Easter Bunnies next year!
HA HA HA!

Down by the Bay

Category: Songs

a.k.a.
Tune See video below
Type of Song Repeat-After-Me
Actions *if you know the actions please provide them in the comments below*
Similar Songs

Lyrics

Down by the bay
Down by the bay
Where the watermelon grow
Where the watermelon grow
I dare not go
I dare not go
For if I do
For if I do
My mother will say,
My mother will say,
“Did you ever see a . . .”
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